last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
