It's like a parade of train wrecks.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
