I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
