the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
