Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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