I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize