been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Randomize
