Say something about gay babies.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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