doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize