Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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