I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
