Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
