I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
