return my video game
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
