Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
