So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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