Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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