I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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