We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
