you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
