Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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