shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
