p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Someone came in the potted fern
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize
