I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
