Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.

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(317): View more from Indiana

The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.

Fav 6 1145 3127
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(816): View more from Missouri

If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.

Fav 5 2547 1019
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.

Fav 4 1383 2471
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(770): View more from Georgia

All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.

Fav 4 1103 756
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(501): View more from Arkansas

Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys

Fav 0 367 188
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(870): View more from Arkansas

Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.

Fav 0 76 8
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