Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
there's paper in my vomit.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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