its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
