I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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