I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
