Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
