butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
