Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
