absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
