goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
