dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
