when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Randomize
