I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
