Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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