yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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