No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Everything about him screamed your future.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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