How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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