Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
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