her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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