you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
