She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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