I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
