She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
