Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I love you.
Bad choice
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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