I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
