adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
