; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
